Things I Can't Afford - A List

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Dear Constant Reader,

I've decided to make a list of things that I can't afford :

1. Florida rental vacation :
Not that is something that I want, but it would be nice to be able to say to people "hey I'm going to Florida, and you're not".

2. A blow-up doll :
This would be so much easier than actually having to have a conversation with the woman that I currently welcome to my bed.

3. Fruit of the month club :
I don't actually eat a lot of fruit, but it would be nice to have some fruit while I hump my blow-up doll during my Florida vacation.

4. A large screen television :
It would be nice to watch the video of my blow-up doll sex in Florida on a big screen wouldn't it?

5. A video store of my own :
This would allow me to rent out the video that I made without having to switch it with a copy of "Driving Miss Daisy" at my current video store.

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