Clerks II: The DVD

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

The special 2-disc edition of "Clerks II" is now on DVD and if you don't have a copy yet then you should be grossly ashamed of yourself.
I picked up a boxset of this and the original "Clerks" for under 35$ at WalMart and I'm so completely not disappointed.
"Clerks II" is a grossly funny movie with a great big heart.
From shot one "Clerks II" rocks.
How about the DVD extras? Over 6 hours of them.
The best scene? The donkey show. Ooh cake!.
Run to your nearest store and pick up your copy of "Clerks II" and if you can get the boxset that includes what's called "The Snowball Edition" of the original (it's own third disc) "Clerks".
I'm not a fan of the original film but the sequel is amazingly good.
Three discs of Kevin Smith fun that any Smith fan needs in their collection now.

"Clerks II" Extras:

o Commentary by director Kevin Smith, producer Scott Mosier, and director of photography David Klein
o Commentary by director Kevin Smith and producer Scott Mosier with actors Brian O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson, Trevor Fehrman, Jennifer Schwalbach, and Jason Mewes
o Podcast commentary director Kevin Smith, producer Scott Mosier, and actor Jeff Anderson
o Deleted Scenes with introduction by Kevin Smith
o "Back To The Well: Clerks II" 90-minute making-of documentary
o "A Closer Look at Interspecies Erotica" featurette
o Bloopers
o 10 Train Wrecks: Video Production Diaries

"Clerks" Extras:

o Commentary by director Kevin Smith and members of the cast and crew
o Deleted Scenes with introduction by Kevin Smith
o Alternate Ending
o Soul Asylum music video
o Theatrical trailer

The View Askew folks know how to do extras!
Finally filmmakers who understand what can be done with DVD's.

Arthur

P.S. I loved "Jersey Girl" too.
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Lord Send Me A Camera

Monday, November 27, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

One of the the biggest disappointments in my life is that I never learned how to ride a unicycle. The problem is that even if I had learned to ride a unicycle I would have never been able to take a picture of it to share with the world. Why? I've never owned a digital camera.
Every year thousands of people around the world go without the correct digital photography equipment which leaves them with a lack of proper unicycle riding photographs. This tragedy has been felt across the planet.
We cannot leave it up to Angelina Jolie or Bono to save the cameraless and must do something beginning in our own neighborhoods.
I supppose it would be easier to have Brad and Angie adopt me so that I could use any possible camera they have but they keep rejecting me despite my many letters.
Don't let me go without a camera on your birthday this year baby Jesus and you just might save me from merely having to describe my life in words and instead give me the chance to do it in beautiful digital photography.
Don't leave me as a second class citizen anymore and bless my doorstep this year with a camera type object of some variety.
I may never learn to ride a unicycle but I will learn to walk with dignity among those who have cameras in their lives.
-
This post was brought to you by HP.
-

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Oh what have I missed ...

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

I've decided to put my unhealthy need to play Second Life to rest and get back to the peaceful and non-creepy world of blogging.
I miss my readers delightful emails and sharing my very important thoughts with the world.
To those that I know that are still trapped I have one message: For the love of God get out!
Second Life is nothing more than a great way to piss away both your real money and your real life. This over-glorified chatroom will cause you to forget what's going on around you very quickly.
-
In the meantime let's give a big "fuck off Arizona State Board of Nursing" and their complaints about the place I wanna have my first heart attack.
-
WASHINGTON (AFP) - A restaurant in the southwestern US state of Arizona that proudly admits to trying to finish off its customers has introduced a new item on its menu -- the "quadruple bypass burger".
The burger at the "Heart Attack Grill" restaurant is stacked with four beef patties, cheese, onions, tomatoes and fried bacon, and weighs in at only 8,000 calories, more than three times what the human body needs in one day.
Patrons who have no appetite for the "quadruple bypass burger" can opt for the "triple" or "double-bypass".
"It's not good for one's health but it's only a joke," John Basso, who opened the restaurant 10 months ago, told AFP.
Customers who have room for more can also order French fries "fried in pure lard" and can purchase cigarettes off the menu. As a courtesy, the restaurant offers its "best customers" a wheelchair service to their cars by waitresses dressed in slinky nurses' outfits.
The idea, however, has not gone down well with the Arizona State Board of Nursing which has expressed concern that some patrons may confuse the waitresses with real nurses.
To avoid any confusion, Basso has posted a long message on his restaurant website saying that his employees in no way are medical professionals.
He said his ultimate goal is to open a restaurant in France.
"I am dreaming of opening a restaurant in Paris," he said.
-
Isn't that the most?
You can visit the site of the world's best restaurant right here: Heart Attack Grill. Tell them that a hairy manly-man with a twelve inch penis who smokes sent you.

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Second Life Gets Creepy & I Get A Good Laugh

Saturday, November 25, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

Today I was invited to an in-game funeral on Second Life for a real player. I couldn't stop laughing upon receiving it. Am I a prick? Yup and here's the log to prove it:
-
[11:43] Brenda Knopfli: In Loving Memory of Brenda Knopfli. Brenda passed peacefully after losing her battle with cancer on November 21st. A memorial event is being held at Guys & Dolls on Sunday, November 26, from 6 PM to 8 PM SL time. All of her friends are welcome to attend

[11:43] Second Life: Brenda Knopfli has left this session.

[11:44] Issac Skomoroklov: R.I.P

[11:45] sammy Bender: R.I.P Brenda

[11:45] Tommy Hunt: R.I.P Brenda we will all miss you

[11:46] sammy Bender: and all the best to her family and friend's in both rl and sl u will b sadley missed :))

[11:46] Joseph Palliard: Sorry I don't attend creepy online funerals for avatars and or the people who played them. Unlike the people who do I have a life. Get some fresh air people.

[11:48] Tommy Hunt: you watch what your saying and get some respect she was a real person like anybody else just sat behind a monitor so watch your words

[11:48] Joseph Palliard: Don't threaten me I can say what I like about whom I like now I'll be over here enjoying reality while you folks bury an avatar

[11:49] Tommy Hunt: oy you fucking prick dont start

[11:49] Tommy Hunt: get clever and you will be sorry noob il tell you now

[11:50] Tommy Hunt: you might think your safe behind a monitor but i will show ya

[11:50] Joseph Palliard: Looks like I already started ... you enjoy your make believe funeral just make sure the morgue does a good job on the avatar corpse .... the pasty look isn't attractive

[11:50] Tommy Hunt: you fucking prick grow up and sort your head out you wanker

[11:51] Joseph Palliard: angry much?

[11:51] Tommy Hunt: people like you need to grow up

[11:51] Tommy Hunt: il tell ya wehat got for the under 16 part of SL it will suit you better

[11:52] Joseph Palliard: you're going on mute now .... oh wait are the pews at the fake funeral gonna be like camping chairs will we get paid to sit? that would be fun ... is there going to be hot dogs and orange drink?
-
I would put a stop to this nonsense if I were the real family and friends of this player. I wonder who logged on under her name anyways? Is the player really dead or is this some sick roleplay thing? Anyway that you slice this it's c-r-e-e-p-y.
I wonder how hard it would be to buzz the memorial in my jet?

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Check Out Antonio

Friday, November 17, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

Considering that I come from the catfish capital of Canada this video holds a special place in my heart.
I entirely question the sanity of the perosn in the video and rightfully so. The transformation that takes place here is the most mesmerizing event since little baby Jesus popped out of Mary oh so many years ago. And that's ... frightening.
Not frightening in the way that say "The Exorcist" was frightening but frightening in the way that Uncle Joe gets at Christmas time after several egg nogs.
I'm not saying that I don't like it because I do. What I'm saying is that watching a man go from man to catfish in such an astonishing way is way more than I can wrap my mind around.
-
Antonio Master Impressionist :

-

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Not Entirely My Friend ...

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

Welcome to my gayest post ever ... erm.
Some idiot over here is throwing around the term "gay" like Richard Simmons throws punches at rude folks in airports.

He is making reference to this video by Elton John from a 1984 song on his "Breaking Hearts" album entitled "Passengers":
-

-
He calls this simply the "Gayest.Video.Ever".
Boy is he barking up the wrong rainbow tree.
If we're going to throw around terms like "gayest ever" then I think I can present a far better nominee for that.
I present to you ...

Elton John - "A Word In Spanish" (1988) ( from the 1988 album "Reg Strikes Back")
-

-
Now that's gay.
Great song, flamingly beautiful video.

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Tassimo Hot Beverage Machine

Dear Constant Reader,

If you enjoy a good cup of coffee or coffeehouse style beverage as much as I do then you're going to want to run over and grab yourself a Tassimo Hot Beverage Machine.
-
Item Description From Site:
This revolutionary one-cup hot beverage maker has taken the world by storm! The Tassimo Hot Beverage System allows you to make the hot drink you want, when you want it. It's truly amazing. The same machine that makes a real espresso and freshly brewed filter coffee from some of your favorite U.S. and European brands, also makes real milk-based beverages - something for everyone. Enjoy a perfect cup of coffee, espresso, latté, cappuccino, créma, hot chocolate or tea at the touch of a button. No fuss, no mess and no waiting in line. The Tassimo System uses premeasured T-DISCS filled with delicious, high-quality coffee, tea, chocolate syrup and real milk to create coffee house style drinks instantly, in the comfort of your home. Each cup is freshly brewed to celebrate its true character and gives you the taste you love, every time.
-
If that isn't the most amazing thing us hot beverage lovers have ever seen then I honestly don't know what is.
I simply cannot think of a better way to enjoy that perfect cup of coffee then by using this handy dandy little machine to make it.
If you're a coffee lover (or know of one) then the Tassimo Hot Beverage Machine is the Christmas gift that you need to pick up this year.
You'll never want to use that same old coffeemaker again.

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

CIBC: Criminal Banking Masterminds

Dear Constant Reader,

The Canadian Imperial Bank Of Commerce is a giant nest of criminals that are sucking Canadian's dry.
If you have a loved one who has an account with these decadent monsters then you need to tell them to get their money out.
If they aren't drowning a person in service charges they are outright locking your money in and holding it hostage. Basically they enjoy making their customers their bitch while living hogwild on the interest that your money is gathering.
Now you're probably saying: "don't most banks do this?". Not even close to the extent that CIBC does. Are they mafia owned? Is CIBC a front for a drug operation?
If you have a CIBC account (of ANY kind) take your money and find a bank that won't press you against the counter and make you their pays-for-lunch lover.
You don't believe how shady they truly can be? Check out this juicy news story from 2005: How CIBC Cashed In on Mutual Fund Fraud. Or maybe this?: CIBC agrees to $80 million US penalty over Enron accounting fraud
Who do you think is paying for these criminal slip-ups?

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-

Where has Arthur been?

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Dear Constant Reader,

My four devoted readers are probably wondering where the hell I've been so here goes ... I've become addicted to Second Life.
It is just this amazingly wild place where you can make anything happen. Whatever your fantasy or wildest fetish you can find it in this game.
I've found myself playing with Tom for the last few days and completely unable to stop.
I thought I'd better let you all out there know that I haven't forgotten about the blog and that I am still alive and well.
My Second Life name is Joseph Pilliard so if you wanna pop in and greet me (and help me build my goddamn house!) then please do so.

Arthur
-
Technorati Tags: [] [] [] []
-