Dear Constant Reader,
These folks need to realize that owning a webcam doesn't make you interesting
New Year's Drunken Karaoke Whore :
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [New Year's] [2008] [Drunk] [Live Video] [Hooker]
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Drunken New Years Karaoke Cunt - LIVE!
Monday, December 31, 2007
Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 9:18 PM 0 comments
Lemme Ask You Something
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
If I were to give you a whole box of Dodge Charger accessories would you be willing to give me a Dodge Charger?
I realize that I wouldn't have any accesories left, but at least I would have a vehicle.
Being without wheels sucks more than anything, and I'm starting to go broke because of it.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Dodge Charger] [Dodge] [Car Parts] [Automobiles] [Cars]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 8:41 AM 0 comments
Are you a hydroxcut man?
Dear Constant Reader,
I'm making dieting one of my resolutions for 2008, but I'm not entirely sure how I'm supposed to go about this.
Diet, and excerise?
Or should I just jam a whole shitload of hydroxycut down my throat, and pray that I don't go into some kind of chemical coma?
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Diet] [Dieting] [Hydroxycut] [2008] [Resolutions]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 8:34 AM 0 comments
Pinup Girl Jeanne Carmen Dies
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
Another one of those classic stars has left the earth today, and I'm a little sad about the whole affair.
The starlets of today could sure learn a thing or two about class acts like Jeanne Carmen.
IRVINE, Calif. (AP) — Jeanne Carmen, the "little country girl" who became a 1950s pinup and actress and hobnobbed with Frank Sinatra and other stars, has died. She was 77.
Carmen died of lymphoma Thursday at her Orange County home, said her son, Brandon James.
Born on Aug. 4, 1930, in Paragould, Ark., Carmen picked cotton with her family before running away at 13.
"I was just a little country girl that wanted to be a movie star," she told the Orange County Register in 1996.
Carmen was still a teenager when she came to New York and, despite having no show business experience, immediately became a dancer in a Broadway show called "Burlesque," with comic Burt Lahr.
She later went into modeling, gaining a measure of success with a series of cheesecake shots in men's magazines. One gig turned into a new career as a trick golfer. On tour with golfer Jack Redmond, she would perform stunts such as hitting a ball out of a man's mouth.
Carmen claimed that she later hustled golfers with Las Vegas mobster Johnny Roselli.
She came to Hollywood while still in her 20s, where she appeared in low-budget movies with such titles as "Guns Don't Argue" and "The Monster of Piedras Blancas."
Carmen also claimed to have had affairs with Sinatra and other celebrities.
She moved to Orange County in 1978.
In addition to her son, Carmen is survived by daughters Melinda Belli and Kellee Jade Campo, and three grandchildren.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Jeanne Carmen] [Hollywood] [Deaths] [Celebrity] [Gossip]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 12:12 PM 0 comments
Hey Christmas Fatties
Dear Constant Reader,
It's December 26th, and time to crack out the treadmills
I think I've eaten more this season than I've ever eaten in my entire life, and I feel completely grossed out about the entire thing.
I'd like to hear from my readers what their diet plans are now that the biggest eating season is over.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Christmas] [Diet] [Exercise] [Food] [Eating]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 12:03 PM 0 comments
Norad Santa Tracker
Monday, December 24, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
The Norad Santa Tracker is a great way for you, and your spoiled brats to follow this fictional tubby ass around the world and let your kids know how soon they'll be able to learn the real meaning of Christmas: They'll get gifts for doing nothing.
We all know that Christians made up Jesus' birthday so that they could take away a holiday from the Pagans, and that should be enough proof that Christianity is a giant ass fraud.
If you have to steal the birthday of your savior from the calendar of another religion (so apparently "Thou Shalt Not Steal" is merely a suggestion?) this should be clue number one that you're believing bullshit.
Merry Fucking Christmas.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Norad Santa Tracker] [Norad.com] [Noradsanta.org] [Santa Radar] [Santatracker]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 11:32 AM 0 comments
7 Things That Are Irritating Me This Week
Sunday, December 23, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
Everything irritates me, and this is a list of just a few of those things.
2007 Things That Irritate Me :
1. "The Golden Compass" protestors.
Christian idiots claim this film (and the books) are indoctrinating kids in dangerous Atheist beliefs. As opposed to indocrinating them in the belief that there's a magical sky creature who watches them jerk themselves off, and judges them because of it?
Christians need to stop trying to impose their fairy tails on us, and us Atheists will stop imposing the truth on them.
2. The Interlake Regional Health Authority.
Do you people hire your staff from the lowest common denominator, and hope that your clients won't notice that they're surrounded by idiots?
It must really stick in your craw to have someone who will keep calling you on your ridiculous bullshit until your ridiculous bullshit stops.
3. The Internet Stars Are Viral
Yay us!
It says a whole pile about our society that we not only celebrate stupidity but we then celebrate a video that jams all the stupidity into one bite-size chunk.
How long till we start putting intellectuals to death, and burning books?
I wonder how far up his ass the techno viking can jam a cowbell?
4. People blaming Jessica Simpson for jinxing some sports guy who chases other guys around for a ball while rednecks cheer him on.
Nobody cares about your moronic interest in sports, and nobody cares who Jessica Simpson currently has jammed up her cooch.
5. The Writers Guild Of America
The majority of us are underpaid for doing real work, and these latte sucking motherfuckers are worried they won't be able to keep up the payments on their luxury cars.
6. WalMart
What demonic monster unleashed this consumerist beast upon the world?
7. "The Simpson's Movie" commentary tracks.
I didn't buy this DVD to see the movie paused every ten minutes so that the filmmakers could congratulate themselves.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Golden Compass] [Viral] [Jessica Simpson] [Sports] [WGA]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 5:43 PM 1 comments
Externalized Anxiety
Monday, December 17, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
I was in a computer store the other day, and witnessed a customer having a fit over the purchase of an external hard drive.
He was sweating, cursing and berating the poor salesman and I watched all of this with great amusement.
Clearly this guy was having computer issues that couldn't be dealt with by thinking happy thoughts, and he needed to be heavily medicated.
Why bring this up?
It's my blog bitches.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Some] [Folks] [Need] [More] [Medication]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 12:08 PM 3 comments
You Must Consider This
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
I've been pondering the concept of another laptop rental situation which (at this point) would be the only way that I could actually afford another laptop.
The problem is that I'm going to end up paying 20 times more for the fucking thing than if I were to save up and get it next year sometimes.
Being a lower-middle-upper-white middle-upper class person sucks the you know what.
What does me being white have to do with anything?
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I] [Have] [Dreams] [Of] [Laptops]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 10:17 PM 3 comments
When You Think About Las Vegas ...
Friday, December 14, 2007
Dear Constant Reader,
When you think about Las Vegas do you think about the dazzling/sparkle of the place, or do you think about the cheap hotel Las Vegas that is simply there to help you blow your kids college fund?
I'm curious to hear from my readers their opinion on this because I am curious what my readers think all the time.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Las Vegas] [Vacation] [Cities] [Gambling] [Fun]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 12:31 AM 3 comments
Whore-ay For Hollywood
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
I just got a phone call telling me that I have been selected to be an extra in a movie. Fun!
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 3:42 PM 2 comments
To Heck With That
Dear Constant Reader,
My caretaker has decided to make yet another land investment, and I'm hoping that because of this he ends up living out on the goddamn street.
The guy is a loser, a drunk and (frankly) I think he's got them there "gay tastes" for young studs.
I can't prove the last part, but who the hell needs proof when completely trashing someone's already trashy reputation?
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [My] [Caretaker] [Is] [A] [Queer]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 7:26 AM 6 comments
I've Been Lookin At 'Em
Dear Constant Reader,
I've been pricing coffee makers, and I've decided that I'm actually better off sticking with instant coffee for now.
I just don't see the point in buying something that makes an entire pot of the fucking stuff when I really only drink about three cups a day.
If I did invest in one of these fucking things I'd probably end up wasting more coffee than I actually ended up drinking.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Give] [Me] [My] [Coffee] [Bitch]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 7:24 AM 7 comments
Drug Rehab - Again
Dear Constant Reader,
My brother is back (how many times is this now?) in drug rehab, and I'm kinda hoping that he swallows his fucking tongue, and dies.
That's probably being cruel, but I really don't give a rats ass at this point.
How the hell are we supposed to feel sorry for someone that's this goddamn pathetic.
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [My] [Brother] [Is] [A] [Junkie]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 7:18 AM 3 comments
Bathroom Smathroom
Dear Constant Reader,
So I spent the morning moving, and pricing bathroom vanities, and I wanted nothing more than to disappear into the staff washroom and tug one out.
I hate working where I need to work, and wish that a hurricane would blow the fucking place to the ground.
I can dream can't I?
Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [WalMart] [Rapes] [And] [Kills] [People]
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Posted by wewerethecoolkids at 7:15 AM 2 comments