Some old, french woman

Dear Constant Reader,

I'm currently living with a french broad who is probably a lunatic. She also happens to suck a really mean dick.
Why is she a crazy?
She insists on wearing these oversized vintage sunglasses everywhere. Everywhere. She wears them in the way that I wear my hockey cap to take a shit.
Ugh.

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I'm] [Feeling] [Very] [Lonely] [Today]
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Me Not Wearing A Seatbelt

Dear Constant Reader,

I don't care how this is going to affect your drivers license or your car insurance, but I will never ever ever ever ever wear a fucking seatbelt.
The fact of the matter is that the fucking things don't save lives. They just don't, and it's not my fault that you're stupid enough to buy all the stupid fucking seatbelt hype.



Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I'm] [Feeling] [Very] [Lonely] [Today]
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Since I can't have one ...

Dear Constant Reader,

People who think that the PS2 is the only gaming system that matter can pretty much chew on the hairiest part of my nutsac region.
I'm not attempting to say that they are mentally challenged, but I'm pretty much sure that they are.
Atari ROCKS!

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I'm] [Feeling] [Very] [Lonely] [Today]
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I've been looking for

Dear Constant Reader,

I've been looking for the best buy in a new television set.
Apparently, my sister is a whore who sold my TV, and now I'm forced to shop for a new one. My mother is an even bigger whore, but she's a whore that I still love. Okay, now that we've established that I love (some) whores, we can move on ...

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I'm] [Feeling] [Very] [Lonely] [Today]
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So I'm Gathering

Dear Constant Reader,

Denial is the most fun that people can have without shoving their things into other peoples things.
My sister is still trying to sell me on the fact that my brother is doing very well in drug rehab, but we also know that she's an idiot.
My brother is going to die on the streets, and I can't wait for that glorious day.

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [My] [Brother] [Is] [A] [Dildo]
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We already know

Dear Constant Reader,

We already know that only fags and really fat women need diet pills, so why do diet pills seem to be so popular? There cannot be that many tubby chicks and turd pushers in the world is there?
I've lost 90 pounds by just eating right and doing a whole helluva lot more walking. I refuse to believe that I need to shove pills down my throat in order to look even more fuckable than I already am.

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Diet] [Pills] [Are] [For] [Pansies]
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A sure sign that you're demon posessed

Dear Constant Reader,

Monday: Perfectly healthy skin.
Tuesday: You're chugging or slathering yourself in the nearest available acne treatments.
Wednesday: Still having problems
Thursday: Still having problems
Friday: Hopefully no problems
Saturday: Rush to the hospital kinda problems. If I'm lucky
Sunday: Start asking Jesus for help

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I'm] [Feeling] [Very] [Lonely] [Today]
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Creepy Creepy Creepy

Dear Constant Reader,

I applied for a job today, and the person that I was interviewed by was too drunk to even stand up. I'm not sure why he was drunk, but I guess it's how he chooses to get through his work day.
School continues, the job hunt continues, and my desire to get out of this fucking house continues.
Oh, and I appear to be doing very well in school.
I still rule.
I can't wait to get drunk, felt up, and fucked at the graduation party.
I'm gonna go take my Anoretix, and jerk-off myself to sleep.

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [Lord] [I] [Wish] [It'd] [Rain]
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It Truly Is A Shame

Dear Constant Reader,

It truly is a shame that none of the exercise equipment in this home is tiny enough to throw at the lughead that uses it.
The only positive thing I can say about this person is that I still get far more pussy than he does.
You do realize that I'm not bragging, right?
I rule!

Arthur
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Technorati Tags: [I] [still] [Get] [More] [Pussy]
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